Watching the movie of our lives from the other side. 🎦🙏🏻😇

I am writing this blog, as it is two years this weekend that I lost my mom. I often wonder where she is, and if she has found peace on the other side. I believe she has. It’s the most surreal thing in the world to lose someone so close to you, such as a parent. I was with my mother in her last moments, when she took her last breath and passed away. The nurses in hospice had prepared me - they know when someone will transition within 24 hours. Watching my mother in her last moments was beautiful. We knew she was ill and in pain, and now she was in her final stage. It was serene, spiritual, and magical in its own way. I was watching her release her pain from this world and go to the other side. 

There has been much documentation regarding what happens after we pass, from people who have experienced a near death experience. They collectively say that we look back on our lives, and review it as though it’s a movie. We see how our actions and decisions have affected other people. We also observe how our actions may have affected their lives and decisions, which, in turn, may have affected other people’s lives and decisions. It’s an ongoing cycle, always turning and twisting.

What I find interesting is that in contrast of this notion, is that while we’re here on earth, we mostly think about ourselves.

I remember years ago speaking with someone who told me he was not spiritual, and that he was an atheist. He shared with me that he knew if he believed in “something,” he would have made different decisions. We both knew he meant “better decisions.”

Why? Because when you live a spiritual life, you believe there’s something bigger than yourself. The “self” wants immediate gratification, it wants to be right, it wants to be recognized, and many times, it wants to be glorified. The ego needs that to survive. Alternatively, thinking of ourselves as part of the “whole,” makes us more compassionate. And as we try to comprehend what we cannot understand, it helps us become more whole with others, and stronger together, as a result. 

Our actions mean something, and that matters, even if someone challenges us. 

I’ll end this blog with a little story Years ago, sitting in a small cafe in New York City, a woman walked in with this incredible flair and I complimented her on her outfit. She responded with, “You don’t know how much that means to me today. I am feeling terrible about myself, ugly and disconnected. I could hardly get out of the house. Your compliment really made my day and uplifted my spirits.” I didn’t know anything about her, but what I did know was what a compliment about someone’s outfit could do for her self esteem and feeling of worthiness.

Many people don’t divulge if they’re having disagreements with their spouses or are going through a divorce, or have concerns about money. They may have frustration with their kids, or concerns about their health. Or it could be they simply feel tired, old, and unlovable.

So, what will your movie show you about your life?

 

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I had a dream…to mind my own business! 😳🙈

I would like to share a dream with you I had in the hopes that it inspires you, and wakes you up to your own “dreams.” In this dream, I was was sitting at the edge of a lake watching the most amazing sunset I had ever experienced. It was magical with colors I hadn’t seen before, both electric and awe-inspiring. I was staring at this enchanting sky, completely taken away by the sheer beauty of it all, allowing the experience to take me outside of myself to another place. All the pieces of life felt like they were in place.

And then suddenly, I heard whispering off to my left. I had to make the decision to continue watching this beautiful sky or look to see what was happening. From habit, obsessive behavior, or just “needing to know,” I turned my head away from this gift to see what was going on. 

I could see there were people in the darkness, but I couldn’t make them out. They were silhouettes speaking in muffled voices. It was not menacing or threatening, but because I wasn’t sure what they were doing, I took all my focus away from the sunset to see what was happening. Again, wondering if they were planning something that I “needed to know about.” It turned out to be nothing. 

When I turned to look back to the sky ready to take in the sheer magnificence of it all, the sunset was gone. I lost the moment. How many moments do we lose, “needing to know” what other people are doing? Saying? Living? Choosing? All of which has nothing to do with us? 

In my dream, I lost the magnificent sunset, but it symbolized so much more. When I awoke, I took this dream as a huge lesson to stay focused on the beauty, the splendor, and the promise of what can be.

I often take pictures of sunrises and sunsets to always remind myself not to lose cherished moments. It’s not easy, and I for one, am always working on this.

May your days be filled with many ongoing moments that will take your breath away, and may your life be everything you want it to be. With clarity, focus, stillness, and courage to implement what we want (not to mention minding our own business!) we can make it our reality. 🙏🏻

 

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Spiritual Sovereignty 👑 . Living authentically and not living for what others will judge us for.

Being concerned with what other people think can be an important part of socialization and inclusion, and it can also hold us back. Being overly concerned about other’s opinions so that we no longer hear or trust our own instincts, is dulling down our senses and intuition. We live in a web of interactions which is designed to keep the system going. There will be those that profit or are kept in charge, those who work very hard to get nowhere and keep the powerful powerful, those who become enraged with the system and commit violence, and those who will give willingly only because they were told to. In this script of life, there will be good guys, bad guys, and people pointing out who is who. Until it switches upside down. 

This happens in families (who is really in charge?) many times, not the ones most vested in keeping the family safe, cared for and together. It happens in business (the hierarchies of unjustified power, backstabbing, favorites, and pacts), in schools (a system that longer works, but no one questions it), and in social interactions (a self nominated “leader,” and everyone willingly falling into a certain role, keeping their place). Call it dynamics or call it the Matrix, it exists.

When we back away from our own sovereignty in order to belong, so we don’t get attacked, stolen from, shamed, or even worse, abandoned, it keeps our higher selves from acting and being in accordance with our own sense of what we know. It takes courage, fearlessness and readiness to face the opposition. All while not being too attached to it all. As we grow in life, we realize it all changes anyway.

Spiritual Sovereignty is not the same as being stubborn, refusing to be open to other ways of looking at life. It is about being one within self, and being open to explore what we may not know. The next time you are in a situation or have an opinion that gets questioned and you are shaken, ask yourself “why is this rocking my world?” Perhaps have a real conversation as to why the other person sees things the way they do. Listen with empathy, an open heart and a curious mind to perhaps alter your opinion, teach you another way of looking at things, or give you another view that might not ultimately change your mind, but opens you for listening nonetheless.

If not wanting to confront someone, read an article that opposes your current situation or your view. Travel to a culture that is different than your own. Ultimately, if you have the courage, ask yourself  “What if everything I thought all along was right, is actually wrong?” 

Then take a minute to really let that sink in, allow yourself to become humbled and connect to the universe knowing we are here to grow and then recreate the grandest version we’ve ever had of ourselves. We have to first see the whole wide world and then decide. And then we can live as we are, as we grow.

 

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